CLASS WAR ISSUE #5 ------------------ /~~~~~\____ -----/ )\__\_) __| (__(____) ) (__(___) --| (__(__) -----\________/ \ \ | | / / > SMASH < / THE \ / / RICH! \ \ / / / | | \ \ \ HOW TO TAKE REVENGE ON YOUR ADVERSARIES AND OTHER STREET SKILLS Submissions: class.war@interzone.apana.org.au INTRO ----- It's CandyMAN here, bringing you issue 5. Just before I tell you what this is about, I'll tell you why. Lately, a cretain person has been giving me way to much shit for me to take (and I've NEVER been one to take shit). So I got to thinking of things to turn this persons life into a living hell. This is what I've come up with. Ways of destroying lives, homes, buisnesses and schools. REVENGE IS SWEET ---------------- First, the legal stuff. Don't try this. Don't even think about trying this. It's all illeagal, dangerous and stupid. OK? Home is where the heart is. So touching. This is where we start. During the night cover they're entire lawn/garden with bleach/salt/weed killer. Then watch them cry in the morning. Try writing messages in the grass:) Glue every door, lock, window shut using some strong two part epoxy. This is really good is you are quiet enough and have the time. Great if they're away on holidays. Buy a bunch of cans of that Selly's expanding filler stuff. It expands to many times it's volume and sets ROCK HARD. Break a small hole in their car window and fill 'er up! Clog their gutters with anything handy. Fill them up with $10 of petrol. Light a match and run. Buy a flare gun. (use your imagination:) Steal their bills untill they start getting final notices. Steal the final notices. Go to the power/gas meters. Rip off the little wax tags that prevent tampering. Losen the screws a tiny bit (half a turn). Let them try and explain. Phone the power/water/gas company, tell them you're at the aitport and forgot to have it disconnected. Hack a voice mail box. Use it to make 100's of wakeup calls per night to their house. Blow up their mail box. Nail a cat to their door.:) Take their garden hose, push it through a few tiles in the roof. Turn it on. If they have a cordless phone, buy an identical one. Sit outside and phone Sweeden. Break in and make 100's of porno calls. Leave no traces. Let the husband/wife try and explain:) Break in and format their hard drives. Put a dead thing in their freezer. Make post bombs. Report an armed burgler in their house. Hope he gets shot:) Remove the license plates from their car. Swap them with another car. Use pliers to rip the valves from the car tires. Paint the house some evil colour. Get a paintball gun, and do it from a distance. Grab a Credit Card generator. Order $1000's of stuff under his name. Send it to his house and office. Place adds for garage sales under his name/address. Put him in personals pages in papers/porno mags. Hide some heroin or whatever in his house. Report him as a dealer. The dogs will find it. Say the magic words. Child Molseter. Beat the living fuck out of him. Fill his muffler with petrol. Grab a pick and make 'Speed Holes' in his car:) Glue every door/lock shut on his car. Tip a can of paint stripper on it. Know anything about electronics? Make a nice little circut with a HUGE capacitor (you'll have to make one. See articles on a Telsa Coil). Hook it up to his TV, computer, etc. Blow up a cat in his car/house:) (on a sad note, some FUCKED up moron in Glen Waverly actually blew up a cat. Not funny.) Hack his BBS/Net accounts. Bleed him dry. Make enemies. Send threats under his name to prime minister/queen/etc. If he has an answering machine, phone right after he leaves his house, and use the whole tape. Saw his car's axel in two. Break every window in his house/office. Put permanent bumper stickers on his car. Use things like "Hitler got it right!" "Death to Christians" "Kill all Niggers" Anything that will cause a row. Better yet, write them on the car in paint stripper. Report him for using/distrubuting pirated software. Write hate mail using his name. Put LOTS of fresh meat under his house/in his roof. It won't stay fresh for long:) Paint a life size picture of 'Barney' on his front door. Angry mobs will do the rest:) Ever seen 'War of the Roses'? Try it. Order the chemicals to make C-4, RDX, etc. under his name/address. He WILL be reported to the police. Infest his house with termite eggs. Available from suppliers to schools. Find a prostitute to give him Herpes! Get a Bikie gang to move in next door. Send threats to Bikie gangs under his name. Place an add/letter in a leading newspaper anouncing he's been Gay for years, and has decided to 'come out of the closet'. Name employer/friends as his sexual partners. Soak a sponge in a heavily starched solution. Tie it up in the smallest possible ball with some string. Let it dry, then cut the string. Flush a bunch of em down the toilet. The plumbing bill will kill him. Poison their food. Well, that's all I can think of for now. Cya in another issue of CLASSWAR! CandyMAN ---------------------- THE END OF CLASS WAR 5 ---------------------- WHERE TO GET CLASS WAR? ----------------------- You can always get a copy of CLASS WAR by sending a blank message to: classw#@interzone.apana.org.au (substitute # for the issue number) Example: classw1@interzone.apana.org.au would send issue #1 Interzone BBS is now the official CLASSWAR HQ! DISTRO WANTED ------------- If you run a bbs/site/homopage why not shove Classwar on? You may become an electronic god before you know it! WRITERS WANTED -------------- So you're the guy who brought the NSA computers down? We want your insights! Send a submission to class.war@interzone.apana.org.au and i promise not to edit/change your stuff! You can remain anonymous, You can become a legend!